by Prichinna
Dear Mary,
The last time we were together, I must admit, it wasn’t the best of times. To help me refresh my own memory, it was a respectable brunch in late January at La Carbonara on West 14th Street in Manhattan. For an additional $12, I could indulge in as much of you as I could – for two hours anyway.
And indulge I did, commencing before I even ordered my eggs Benny. This might have been the first mistake in our relationship. But Mary, you were just a starter and you got me primed for the playoff games at Ainsworth around the block. Liquor before beer, have no fear? Yeah…, no.
After that scene, Mary dear, I swore I would stay away from you. Not that it was entirely your fault, you see, but I don’t really think I was all that into you anyway. And then I met your sister, Square Mary. Not only does she reside much closer to me than you - at The Grey Horse Tavern in Bayport - but there was no need for over indulgence either.
Now maybe I just wasn’t on a mission this time around, or maybe I just wanted to savor her. She is much pricier than you, $11 for just one crystal quilted Ball Jar full. Yeah, I definitely couldn’t afford to overdue it this time.
So I am thinking, darling, you should take some pointers from your sis. First off, the garnish. While the celery stalk makes quite the fine stirrer, a pickled green bean is just so much tastier. The sweet brine clears the palate and compliments the savory taste of spicy juice. Tabasco? Uh-uh, dash of cayenne is all you really need. Horseradish and lemon? Most definitely. But will any old vodka do? No way José. This is where you and your sister differ entirely. Square Mary is made with a cucumber-infused vodka. Yum!
The Grey Horse Tavern uses Square One Cucumber vodka, Square Mary’s namesake. Square One is organically produced in North Dakota from an organic rye. It is infused with cucumber essence, which produces a subtle yet clearly defined smooth-heated vodka. Paired with a perfectly blended tomato mixture, it leaves you with a surprisingly refreshing twist. A twist I just did not experience with you that day in January. Or ever before actually. I even found myself craving Square Mary on Monday afternoon…
So Mary, I don’t think we can hang out anymore. I am sorry to say, but I am leaving you for your zestier sister.
Best Regards,
The Savvy Bruncher
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